Irony

I was looking through the paper, like I do each morning and apparently all of those people/gang members that they arrested before Christmas are starting to come before the courts. Very scary because I know some of them from waitressing at the strip club and not only did I used to buy from them, I used to sell, too. For example, if someone at the club felt comfortable asking me then I would "middleman" for him, go to the dealer and get him the stuff. This way, I could get some extra stuff for myself from the dealer if I helped him enough times throughout the night. Also, I would charge the customer a little more for "stuff" and keep the extra money for myself if I was running low on tips. No one complained or seemed to notice because they were so spaced out anyway. It really wasn't me to a) be involved in shit like that and b) to rip people off but seeing as I had a little habit to maintain myself I needed to do something to have some cash at the end of the night. Plus, I hate to admit this but I felt so badass being involved, it was like a little experience/experiment of mine. Thank God I didn't get caught. I always used my instincts when dealing with strangers and thankfully understood that being high didn't entitle me to be so overly confident. At the end, I was one of those girls that I swore I'd never be, going home at the end of the night super high but just barely making my float. I knew my days at the club were numbered but I didn't give a shit, it was as if my whole time working there was an F-YOU to the whole world, I could do whatever I want, so ha ha. But alas, the joke was on me as I was fired from my job and it was downhill from there. A few months later, all those guys were arrested and I was at home recovering, after a lengthy detox. It was the first time my mom honestly came through for me and I will never forget that. She saved my life just as I blame her for ruining it.